Curvy Girl Has Expectations.

Oh. My. Gosh. That dress is only $5.00!? Want. Want it NOW. Wait. Hold on. So you’re telling me that it took over a month for it to arrive? And it looks like THAT in real life??

My upcoming Wish.com order is filled with sexy looks. I’m on pins and needles waiting for my orders to arrive and unlike Cass Elle, I have a semblance of self control.

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What is it: Despite the exasperated title, it’s a casual short mini dress. The silhouette is one that will flatter my body and accentuate my assets (ahem…I am rather large chested). I ordered it in the blue.

 

What I notice: This dress will be 100% see through. I don’t have to read the reviews to know this. The material looks super thin. Despite what the title says, I wouldn’t wear this in summer. I’d pair it with a nice pair of leggings and some tall boots. I ordered it in a large because I’d rather it be too big than too small…which is a good, basic Wish.com philosophy.

 

Hopes and dreams: I don’t have sky high hopes for this product. I already know the material will be revealing – but I’m confident I’ll get a nice business casual dress for spring, fall and winter.

 

Order total: $13.30 CAD

 

Order date: February 28th, 2017

 

Expected arrival: March 28th, 2017

 

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What is it: This is a sexy dress….a very sexy dress. I ordered it in green because I want to look like an emerald goddess.

 

What I notice: Again, the material will likely be very thin. I may have to wear a slip under this dress. Or – because it is meant to be a sexy dress – wear some cute underwear and call it a day. I don’t think I can wear this to the office, but I will try. This WILL require some extra attention to my undergarments on top. This is a dress that will require boob tape. Anyone who wears this dress will require some boob “tape-age” in order to get that gorgeous cleavage shown on the model. Don’t be fooled. Boob tape MUST happen here.

 

Hopes and dreams: I have high hopes for this dress, despite my better judgment. I want it to look good so very badly. Please make me sexy dress.

 

Order total: I ordered this with another item. This dress was a whopping $16.00 though (big spender here).

 

Order date: February 28, 2017

 

Expected arrival: March 28, 2017

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What is it: A swimsuit. A very very sexy swimsuit. I would definitely like to be roaming the beach in this one-piece. This might require some expert boob shifting in order to make the gals stay in their assigned places, but I have to do the expert shift in my $150 suit from The Bay.

 

What I notice: For some reason I’m less concerned about the fabric on a swimsuit. The description says it is made of polyester. Polyester is supposed to be the most popular fabric used to make swimwear – so, given they aren’t lying in the description, I think the fabric should be fine. The biggest risk will be where the open chest lands in relation to the solid black fabric that covers the actual nipples. And perhaps some concern might arise in how much of my bum this suit will actually cover. I guess I’d better be pretty body confident in this one!

 

Hopes and dreams: I have to say, I have high hopes for this item too. I feel more confident ordering a swimsuit than a dress, because worst comes to worse I’ll just swim in the deep end.

 

Order total: This suit was partnered with the green dress. It cost me $12.00 – a little better than $150.00.

 

Order date: February 28, 2017

 

Expected arrival: March 28. 2017

 

Someday, somehow, these orders will arrive. The 28th is creeping up. The question is,  what will the future hold – gloriously, gorgeous clothing? Or a fashion disaster?

 

-Curvy Girl

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